Month: February 2018

Understanding What Motivates You

Work Wear Wednesday

Work Wear Wednesday

Work Wear Wednesday

Work Wear Wednesday

Work Wear Wednesday

Work Wear Wednesday

Work Wear Wednesday

Work Wear Wednesday

Work Wear Wednesday

Blazer: Topshop | Top: Similar | Skirt: LOFT | Shoes: Nordstrom | Purse: Amazon

Photography by: Ban Avenue

I hadn’t planned on sharing this today but as are most of my blog posts, this one was spurred by an Instagram discussion. That Instagram discussion was spurred by my random thoughts while taking a walk around the neighborhood (something I’m trying to be better about doing).

Although I am a finance major and relatively business minded, I have never been motivated by money. Maybe that’s because I grew up surrounded by it and have had a fairly easy time in the financial department, but nonetheless money has just never been the driving source to motivate me. I think back to when my parents would grant us an allowance each month if we completed our chores. I almost never got an allowance- shocker!! But even a much younger, simpler minded Shelbi was more driven by the promise of TCBY or a gold star than money- imagine that!

So this made me think, if not money, then what drives me? How do I measure success? I had a good idea of what my drivers might be but I decided to hit up my good friend, Google, to see what other factors normally motivate people. And here is what she (yes, I’ve declared Google to be a wise woman) said.

1. Money and Rewards


Most people wake up each morning and head into work solely because of the reason they have bills to pay and work is an end to a means to pay those bills. Most people are simply working for the money and no other reason. A lot of people think that all they want is money, but what they do not realize is money is not usually the end product they are actually wanting. People want money to pay bills so that they can feel secure, to buy a nice car so that they can feel cool, to pay off their debts so that they can feel accomplished.

2. Desire to be the Best


Some people cannot stand being second best. Whether it is pride or hating to lose, these people push themselves the hardest when they know they are competing for that number one spot. Even if that “number one spot” is something they have created in their mind and isn’t actually something physically attainable. These people usually have no problem sacrificing weekends, skipping out on family dinners, or waking up at 5 to get ahead of the game.

3. Helping Others


And then some are motivated by helping others because they want to bring about change, motivation or inspiration into others’ lives. They care about making the world a better place.They feel happiest when they feel like they are making a difference a bringing about a greater good in someone’s life beside their own.

4. Power and Fame


This is a common motivator right behind money and normally go hand in hand because most people associate power and fame with how much money you have. People that are driven by power and fame usually are craving attention and acceptance of some kind. In this day and age of celebrities, Youtube sensations, and social influencers, there is more interest than ever to put ourselves out there to attract a large following and revel in the attention from complete strangers. Normally those whose number one motivator in life is fame, are normally met with disappointment because they always seem to want more.

5. Recognition


Know somebody that always has to be right? Or makes sure that everyone else knows that they accomplished their goal? Some people feel most accomplished or proud of themselves when they are recognized publicly. This can be as small as a simple thank you, just something to show that somebody recognizes and appreciates that you are doing a good job. It has been proven that recognition in any shape or form tends to increase a person’s sense of worth which in turn produces an increased sense of pride and satisfaction in their work. This is why a lot of companies do Employee of the Month.

6. The Passion


Passion is the strongest motivator out there. It is what can make us sacrifice sleep or leisure time in order to do something we love. The power of passion spreads through all parts of life, whether it be a sport, hobby, family, friends, etc. Passion can make us do some crazy things that money can’t. Sadly, most people do not find passion in their jobs. They become zombies just going through the motion of their job. But those that are passionate about their jobs, feel as though they have never had to work a day in their life!


So what does all of this mean? Once you understand what drives and motivates you, you can better your work ethic and turn your work into a passionate career. By identifying what it is that motivates us, we can enhance the factor used to obtain success. Because without motivation, you will never have the drive to fulfill your hopes and dreams.

Most of us are a mixture of several of these. My number one motivator is most definitely helping others. While I can get caught up in the power and fame craze of social media, at the end of the day I find myself most concerned with thoughts like, “Did I make a difference in anyone’s life today?”, “Am I making a positive impact?”, “Am I using my God given gifts to help make a difference?”. And even if I dropped followers or didn’t get very many likes on my Instagram photo that day, as long as I received one message or comment throughout the day from one of you that said you can relate to what I am sharing or that something I shared inspired or made you feel good about yourself, well then I can go to sleep with a happy heart and wake up the next morning ready to do it all again!

What motivates you? I’d love to hear in the comments below!

 

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Sale Alert: SHOPBOP

**CLICK AN IMAGE TO SHOP THE ITEM DIRECTLY**

SHOPBOP is the best place to get designer items for a steal! For those that haven’t heard of them, they are like an online Nordstrom and carry just about every designer brand you can think of! Some of my favorite brands that they carry include: Free PeopleLevi’sMadewellSam Edelman, SPANX and so many more! Use code GOBIG18 to save BIG. The more you spend, the bigger the discount. Pro tip: if something that you are wanting does not qualify for the promotion, all you have to do to get the discount is apply something that does. So if you want a pair of $199 denim, add something to your cart that is at least $1 and qualifies for the promotion.

Shopbop Sale

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Charleston, SC in 48 Hours

Charleston City Guide

Charleston, SC had been on the top of mama and I’s travel list for quite some time and if it’s not on yours already, it should be! You will not find another place that offers so much southern hospitality, charm, history, and good old fashioned comfort food. It’s the perfect destination for a weekend trip because while this charming town has a lot to offer, it is easily done in 48 hours! Sure, there are some restaurants and sights that we didn’t get the chance to try out, but all the more reason to make it an annual trip 🙂 My one piece of advice if you are only staying for 48 hours is to stay somewhere downtown so that everything is within walking distance of your hotel!

W H E R E  T O  S T A Y

The Restoration Hotel. After several recommendations from friends, we felt like The Restoration Hotel checked off everything on the check list. Cute. Affordable. Great location. Lots of amenities. Coffee and and food choices on site. Did I mention cute?!

When visiting Charleston you have one of two types of choices for hotel options. You can go the old fashioned, vintage southern charm route or you can go for something a bit more modern. We wanted the best of both worlds. The Restoration provided touches of southern charm while still feeling like a luxurious getaway. My personal favorite thing about the aesthetic of the hotel was the exposed brick throughout each room. Not something that you see in Texas!

Not only were the rooms extremely spacious, turn down service is provided, breakfast is brought to your door each morning (in a picnic basket!), there is a cute coffee shop on site, a library to use as you please, and a more than accommodating staff! The Rise is the coffee shop attached to the hotel and dubbed to be “the most Instagrammable shop in Charleston” which I can attest to. The Watch is their rooftop bar and restaurant that draws quite the crowd as it should for it’s view of downtown Charleston, great ambiance, and great food! There is also a spa on site if you would like to treat yourself!

Charleston City Guide

Charleston City Guide

Charleston City Guide

Photography by: N. Mickle

W H E R E  T O  E A T

  • B R E A K F A S T/ B R U N C H
    • Hominy Grill– Known for their shrimp and grits but I opted but for “Charleston Nasty”- a fried chicken biscuit topped with gravy. The long lines are well worth the wait plus they have an outside drink window while you wait so you can enjoy a mimosa on the patio.
    • The Daily– The same owners as Butcher and Bee but we preferred this place. The Daily has a hip vibe and very small menu. That being said, if you want something quick and good, this is the place!  I was a huge fan of their avocado toast and blueberry coconut smoothie.
    • Husk– I put this on here specifically for brunch because you have to go for the shrimp and grits- oh and the cornbread too! Best shrimp and grits in Charleston and they serve old fashioned cornbread with best flavored butter you’ve ever tasted. If you go for dinner, I’ve been told to sit on the bar side which is a carriage house and has the best burgers!
    • Callie’s Hot Little Biscuit– Most delicious breakfast biscuits ever. If you wanted to do this before a full on brunch or treat yourself to a snack later in the day, you totally could as they are snack sized!
  • L U N C H/ D I N N E R
    • 167 Raw– On the smaller side so I would suggest this place for lunch or an early dinner. They are famous for their oyster bar and lobster roll!
    • Cru Cafe– Southern comfort food done right! They certainly have something for everyone. If the weather is nice, they also have a great outdoor seating situation.
    • The Watch– If you are staying at the Restoration Hotel then this rooftop restaurant is very convenient! I highly suggest their oysters and scallops. The scallops were the best we had the entire trip!Charleston City Guide
    • 5Church– Hands down our favorite dinner spot and there is no way that I will do it justice. I tried to take pictures but you have to see it to get the full affect. This restaurant is made out of an old church so there are still stained glass windows and the bar is made from an alter. The ceiling is miles high and has words written all over it. If you don’t go here, I can promise you are missing out. We easily hung out here for 4-5 hours! All of their dishes are extremely creative and a true foodie’s delight. I highly suggest the meatballs and scallops.
    • Poogan’s Porch– We were so hungry and the food was so good that no pictures were even captured. This little yellow house is right next door to Husk and is everything the reviews made it out to be. Make sure to make a reservation as it is a hopping place. I got the short rib ragu with sweet potato gnocchi and goat cheese and holy cow I’m still dreaming of it!
    • The Darling Oyster– If you want oysters, look no further. This cute spot has everything you could ever dream of when it comes to oysters! And since Charleston is right on the water, you haven’t had a fresh oyster until you’ve tried them in Charleston!

W H E R E  T O  D R I N K

  • C O F F E E
    • The Rise– This is the coffee shop that is attached to the Restoration Hotel and dubbed to be “the most Instagrammable coffee shop in Charleston”. Not only is it cute though, the coffee is dang good. I had it every morning that I was there. I’m not sure how long they will have the Winter Thyme latte but if it is still available when you are there, GET IT. Charleston City Guide
    • Black Tap– We didn’t venture here but I’ve heard it is another super cute coffee shop!
  • C O C K T A I L S
    • Zero George– This hotel is everything you dream of when you think of Charleston. If you aren’t already staying here or coming for dinner, make sure to at least stop by for drinks. They do happy hour prices and you can choose to sit anywhere in the house that you like. My personal favorite spot is outside on the covered balcony.Charleston City Guide
    • The Watch– Even if you don’t make it here for dinner, I’d highly suggest stopping by for at least drinks. The view and cute rooftop are the perfect setting for a pre-dinner cocktail or glass of wine.Dress: Nordstrom | Bag: Urban Outfitters | Jacket: Similar
    • The Gin Joint- Such a fun and cozy spot that comes highly recommended. If you like to sip on a fancy cocktail and enjoy a creative atmosphere, this is the place! Make sure to do the bartender’s choice- SO MUCH FUN!
    • The Belmont– This bar is AMAZING. They have the best cocktail bar in Charleston and if that didn’t already sell you, they even have homemade poptarts for dessert.

S I G H T S  T O  S E E

  • King’s Street– The best shopping in Charleston, seriously. Even if you just want to window shop, this is the place! I suggest starting here and then making your way to The Battery, Waterfront and surrounding neighborhoods. It’s all in walking or biking distance to each other. Charleston City GuideTop: Nordstrom | Jeans: LOFT | Shoes: Similar | Sunglasses: Raybans
  • The Battery– Make sure you walk down to The Battery and explore the neighborbood around there. So many cute and historic spots. 
  • Waterfront Park– An ocean view and a beautiful walk around the harbor. There is also a Pineapple fountain that you must see. If you didn’t know, pineapples are a symbol of hospitality and they are all over the place in Charleston!Charleston City Guide
  • Rainbow Row– The iconic row of 13 colorful houses. I personally thought it was a little overrated and not as “picture-esque” as it looks but still a cute spot to visit on your walk around Charleston.Charleston City Guide
  • Plantations– There are several plantations in Charleston that allow for visitors and each holds a special piece of history. All of them are said to be gorgeous in their own way. Since we only had a few hours, we made the trek to Mount Pleasant to see “The Notebook” house otherwise known as the Boone Hall Plantation. You only need an hour or two to do this but Mount Pleasant is about 20 minutes away from downtown Charleston and can be easily accessed with Uber if you do not have your own car.Charleston City GuideTop: Target | Leggings: Spanx | Jacket: Similar | Shoes: Nike
  • Sullivan’s Island– Charleston is home to a few beaches, but if you only have time for one, make sure to hit up Sullivan’s Island! The beach isn’t especially the prettiest but being so close to the ocean, it’s a fun afternoon spot to enjoy the sun. We stopped by The Daily and picked up food/drinks to take down to the beach. Charleston City GuideSwimsuit: Aerie | Hat: Similar | Sunglasses: Raybans

*This post is done in partnership with The Restoration Hotel. All thoughts and opinions are my own.*

Instagram worthy spots in Charleston, SC
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Life Update: To Work or Not to Work

Bodycon Work Dress

Bodycon Work Dress

Bodycon Work Dress

Bodycon Work Dress

Bodycon Work Dress

Bodycon Work Dress

Bodycon Work Dress

Dress: Topshop | Shoes: Similar | Bag: Amazon | Sunglasses: Rayban

Photography by: Ban Avenue

If I had a dollar for every time I got asked “So, have you started looking for jobs yet?” I would have enough money to put into a retirement fund so that I’d never have to work another day again in my life. Me dramatic? Never. But I know it’s a question that I have not addressed publicly yet, so here it goes. The simple answer: no.

Why? Well after not having a desk job for the past 6 months (holy cow time flies), I cannot say that I miss it one bit. While I don’t see myself blogging full time forever, I am taking my sweet time before rushing back into the corporate world. One reason why it’s taking awhile is that I’ve been doing a lot of soul searching and thinking about what I want to do next. I know that I want to change industries. While the energy industry is a lucrative one, it’s not something I am passionate about. I’m hoping to find something within the fashion/beauty, press relations, or digital marketing realm next. I’ve been doing a little research on types of jobs that I might like to venture into but nothing too serious.

I am being picky because I can be and in the meantime I’m soaking up every minute of freedom that I have to blog my little heart out, travel as much as I please, and spend time with friends and family. If there is one thing that I keep hearing over and over from family, friends and all of you is to take this time while I am not tied down to focus on myself, be selfish, and take every opportunity that I can. So this is my way of trying to do just that.

The next question that usually follows after I tell people this is, “So why don’t you just blog full time?”. Well because the income is not predictable enough and I enjoy the finer things in life. I like to travel, I like to attend happy hours, I like fancy shoes, and I like to have enough money left over after all of those things to put into my savings. I tend to blow and go which means I have to have an income source that can support that and then some. I’ll deep dive into blogging income another day but in summary, some months are better than others. You don’t have a set paycheck with a set amount. It’s all about how many deals you close and how many sales you make, which can vary from month to month. So while some months I might make several thousand, other months I struggle to cover all my expenses. The inconsistency scares me.

Another factor is insurance. I had to get my own insurance since I’ve been self employed and let me just tell you- IT SUCKS. It is crappy insurance and I’m honestly not sure what I am paying for. I might as well be throwing $200 down the drain every month. Adulting is the worst. If I had a husband that brought in another (more stable) income source and better insurance coverage, I would probably never go back to a desk job. But because I’m a boss a** b**** that don’t need no man (for the time being), I’ll eventually have to call off the party and go back to work! But is that day tomorrow? Is that day a month from now or maybe a year from now? The jury is still out.

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Tuesday Trend: Espadrilles

**CLICK AN IMAGE TO SHOP THE ITEM DIRECTLY**

I’ve shared so many espadrilles on my Instagram that I thought it was about time to do a round up on the blog. While this trend really started several years ago (we can thank Chloe and then Marc Fisher for that one), this year there are just so many options at all price points. Thank goodness! We are seeing espadrilles come in sneaker, wedges, slide and every other form you can imagine. If you can dream it, I guarantee they already have it 😉

Although I held off buying a pair of the Marc Fishers for the past two years, I finally caved (I bought these) and am now wondering why I spent all of this money on dupes when the splurge is this good. If you are looking for a good dupe though, these are hands down my favorite and SO comfortable. If you want to shop either collage, simply click on the image that you want to shop.

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