Dear Shelbi

Photography by: Allison Ermon

Top: Similar | Skirt: Similar | Shoes: Target | Earrings: Similar | Bracelet: Similar

Hi everyone! Recently a lot of you have been asking me for blog advice, and I absolutely LOVE answering those questions when I get them. Seriously, if you ever have any questions, send them my way and I would be more than happy to answer whatever you are wondering. I am honestly flattered to hear from you guys!

Anywho, I always tell everyone that my one piece of blog advice is to be transparent and not be afraid to get real on your blog. I tell everyone this yet lately, I have felt like I am not doing the same with you. Like I am scared to open up or that I might be judged for something that I say. Well that is going to stop today. I want this to be a place where yes, I share my daily outfits and fashion inspiration, but I also want it to be more than that. I want it to be deeper than that. By opening up and sharing what’s on my heart, maybe I can help one person or connect with someone who is at the same place in life.

One of my best friends, Brittany from Hello Honey blog, had the idea first to write a letter to herself. Then this past weekend at Brunch and Slay, one of the speakers asked us all what we would write in a letter to ourselves. What would we say if we were writing to ourself 10 years from now? Well, that really got me thinking and so here it goes. I guess if I’m going to really do this, I better start this off right so here it goes.

Dear Shelbi,

That probably sounds weird reading a letter to yourself from yourself but just go with it. You are always giving advice to others, and pretty darn good advice at that, but you never seem to take your own. It probably doesn’t help that you are flying through life at a million miles a minute and barely pause to take time for yourself. That’s one thing that you need to learn, to pause and be present, especially for the people and things that matter most to you. At the end of the day there will always be more work, there will always be more things to do, and your to-do list might never get done, but none of that is important. What is important is that you show up for the people that show up for you and even when sometimes they don’t. Don’t lose sight of what is important in life and when you do, pause, put down the worries of deadlines, fear of missing out, laziness, or any other excuses and show up. Be present.

Stop worrying about what you cannot control. It’s going to take you a little while to find the path to what you want to do in life but don’t stop trying. Each new person you meet and each new experience is going to bring you closer to where you are supposed to be. Slowly but surely you will find your way. Don’t even worry about boys. The moment you stop looking is when God will place somebody in your life. Or that’s what you’ve got to keep telling yourself otherwise you are going to go crazy and overthink everything more than you already do. But really, trust God always because he’s got your back even when you start to think he doesn’t.

Our world is starting to harden you and each new tragedy makes you more and more emotionless. Don’t ever become numb. Instead feel everything, even when you don’t want to. Even through the breakups that feel like they will never pass. Even when friends start to fade away. Even when those close to you go to be with the Lord. It won’t be easy but it will be worth it. You will be stronger and you will make it. Find happiness in the little things even when it is hard. Get out, explore and be adventurous, even when you aren’t feeling up to it because that’s when you end up having the most fun and come back smiling.

Be smart with your finances. You were a Finance major after all! Stop being lazy and start caring about saving money. I know that you joke that there is no use in taking any money to the grave with you but let’s be real here for a minute. You are going to live a long life (if you don’t run out of money and become a hobo!) so start thinking about the fact that some day you will have bigger bills to pay than your credit card bill consisting of online shopping and excessive Chick-fil-a trips. Some day you will want to buy a house and you might even be crazy enough to have kids and if they are anything like you, they are going to cost a fortune!

When it comes to friends- quality over quantity. You make friends easily but you are picky about who you let in. You read people far too well and that is something that may get you in to trouble sometimes, but it is also the reason why you are selective when it comes to people you trust. You also have never had a problem telling it how it is. You call it “honesty” but others who aren’t as upfront might find it rude sometimes. Don’t lost your sense of honesty but maybe tone it down a notch. Sally doesn’t need to actually know if she looks fat in that crop top. Maybe just let that one slide. But really, if you are ever feeling down about the quantity of friends that you have, remember that you are far more lucky to have quality friends than an abundance of friends that do not genuinely care about you.

Ok if you’ve made it this far, I have one last piece of advice for you. You have got to stop eating like crap and start taking care of your body. I know you think that you will never gain weight and that you’d literally rather die than go to the grocery store, but you have got to learn what green beans taste like. Also your poor future husband would probably appreciate it if you learned to cook because a diet consisting of Spaghetti O’s and frozen pizza is probably not going to cut it. Hint hint: this would probably also help you cut down on your credit card bills since you eat every single meal out.

 Above all, remember to count your blessings, give thanks where it is due, stand up for what you believe in, show up and be present, put your phone down, get more sleep, learn to like green beans, do more of what makes your soul happy, spend less on clothes, and never lose sight of who you are and what you want in life.